"Josh needs"

Since all of my posts have been about the conference, I thought I would post something off-subject for humor sake. I did this a little over a year ago, and well... it raised a very long discussion about the use of profanity... sorry. This time, no profanity (I was only copying and pasting what was on google...); so... without further delay... Here's the January 2006 edition of "Josh needs" (copied straight from google.com)
1. Josh needs a replacement tray so his daughter can dine in NEST style.
2. Josh Needs Extra Lovin' to Keep Mind Off ScarJo.
3. Josh needs some way to let off some steam other than either insulting his staff in a thank-you speech or yelling at everyone about the numbers not lining up. (sorry)
4. JOSH NEEDS A HAIRNETT
5. Josh needs know there is a large community of supporters wishing him well, and waiting for his return. (ahh... how touching... thanks you guys)
6. Josh needs to get Bob the highest resolution available for the logo.
7. Josh: needs a new macbook pro :( (YES!!!)
8. Josh needs blood, you have the kind he needs, so your coming back with me.
9. Josh needs to know that staying far, far away from that serial skank would be in his best interest. (um... okay)
10. Josh needs to stop looking at the ridiculous plasma section and come back to cathode-ray reality. (what?!)

so... the jist is to google "____________ needs" (insert your name in the blank) and find the first 10 that are interesting or make you laugh... or you find entertaining... you get it.